Sunday, April 6, 2014

This past Thursday night, my mentor Jim, got me a position to sing and play my guitar at a restaurant called Rochester Mills Brewery. It was such an incredible experience and although this may sound cliché, I learned a lot. Before I went on stage I don't think I could explain the nervousness I was feeling in my body. I felt so short on my breath and my hands were sweating unnatural amounts. Before I went on, I told my dad that I wanted to back out. And he looked at me and said, "I'm bot going to force you to do anything you don't want to do but give me one reason why you won't go out there and play." And I was going through all the different possibilities in my head and then I stopped and realized that I would never get another chance like this. I realized that in the end, it wouldn't matter if I completely embarrassed myself, because I took a chance that was worth taking. Well, it turned out that it all went very well actually and I couldn't of been more proud of myself for not giving up.

I also realized that if there is something that I truly want in life, that I have to go get it. I have to put all of my effort into it as well. Not 50%, not 75%, I need to put my 100% effort into it. What I have learned is that if you want to be successful you can be successful, but you have to be willing to do everything in your power to get to where you want to be. That's what I believe separates achievers from dreamers. I think that there are so many people that sit around dreaming and wanting their dream and they may work for it but they don't work hard enough. If you want something, you need to go get it with everything you have. "Most of us want to reach our goals, but we don't want them as much as we want to be cool, we don't want them as much as we want to fit in, we don't want them as much as we want to party, some of us don't want them as bad as we want to sleep in." I heard a quote like that somewhere but I cant exactly remember where but it has stuck with me. It's a quote that we should all live off of.

Sunday, March 23, 2014

Got to get going

      This past couple weeks, reality truly set in for me. I didn't realize how close I was to on end of the year. So, in order to be able to complete my project I decided to cut my song number down to three songs instead of 5 due to the fact that songwriting is much harder than I thought it would be. I got in touch with my mentor and told him how we needed to record the songs soon. He then responded and informed me that he knows a few of really good studios down in Nashville and that we could possibly record down in Nashville rather than here in Detroit. At first, I didn't understand why we wouldn't just record here but I realized that if  I were to go down to Nashville I could be exposed to a great singing experience. Along with my membership in NSAI, I am allowed to have 2 meet-ups with the head songwriters for the program. So, I was thinking that if I was able to take this trip down to Nashville, I could do those meet-ups that come along with my organization. Although I am really stoked about this whole idea, my parents aren't necessarily on the same thinking path as I am. They don't think that it is necessary for me to go down to Nashville to record. And they're right. It is not necessary but, it would be an experience of a life time. The more they keep telling me that it wont happen, the more of a desire I have to find a way to make this trip work.

        I think the point of following what you want to do is the most important thing. I believe that if there's a will there's a way. It's not just about following what you want to do but going after what you want to do. In order to get to where you want to go, you need to be willing to sacrifice some things. If you really want to get somewhere in life, you can get there. I believe that no one can tell you what you can and cannot do. Not even your parents. Now, that may sound bad but it's the truth. I want to take this trip to Nashville and experience this opportunity but my parents told me no. But I will not let that one answer dictate my future. Along the journey to get to your goal you're going to be told "no", they're going to say "you can't", people my tell you "that's just unrealistic" or "that's not possible". But you can't let those words dictate your future, just as I won't let those words decide what my future will bring. I don't exactly know how I will convince my family that this trip is important but I know that I will find a way to get them to have an open-mind to this idea.

          As of right now I am only on my second song. Even typing that stresses me out. I have another entire song to write which is not going to be easy. Writing a good song is not easy. At all. I am making a short term goal that by the end of this week I will have my last song be outlined. I will most likely meet  with Jim the week after this week and hopefully will be able to wrap up everything and get the details about Nashville

Sunday, March 2, 2014


            I think 20Time is the best project I have experienced throughout all my years of schooling. 20Time allows us kids to focus on the things we love and truly want to peruse rather than focusing on what we are told to peruse. To me, the project as a whole is outstanding. My singing career has gotten much further than I ever thought it could go. Its so amazing to see that if you really put your time and effort into something that you love, you can go places. If there's a will there is a way. 20Time is an escape for me. It lets me do something for myself. I love that every Friday we get the chance to work on it in class. It I something that I actually look forward to at school, which is weird to say. Different obstacles have gotten in the way of  this project but that's what I love about this project. Its realistic. Not everything you do is going to run smoothly. Another thing that I love about this project is that I jumped to the unknown in a way. I didn't really have any clue what I was doing.  I just picked what I wanted to do my project on and I dove right in not knowing where to begin. But, that's what makes this have so much variety. It shows me that everyone has different goals and everyone has different ways of getting to their goals.
           Although this project has such amazing aspects there are some downfalls. Sometimes in my project I feel almost stuck and don't know where to go. I don't think that there is anything that can be done to change that, but I think that everyone who is doing this project has probably struggled with this from time to time throughout this project. At times I  am not really sure what to do with the project just because I am not sure to where I want to go next to go with it.
          To be honest I would not change anything in my project so far. That is not because everything has gone smoothly but is because all the obstacles that I have gone through. I think all those obstacles where put there by God for a reason. I don't think I have any regrets with what has been placed in this project because I've learned a lot from it all.

Monday, February 24, 2014

Break from Reality

This past week I've taken a total break from my life and my reality. I tried to put every situation that had been occurring in my life out of the picture. I went down to Florida to visit my grandparents. When putting all these issues aside, I realized how amazing life really is. I know that may sound cliche and almost cheesy but it's the truth. I realized how much there is out there that is so unknown to us. Many people in Grosse Pointe, my home town, are a set on going to college in state and having a family and returning to Grosse Pointe for the rest of their lives. And, if that's what you want to do, that's completly lay fine. I just think that we are all so set on doing what we've been taught to do. To do homework a certain way, to do a spot a certain way, to follow a certain religion because that's what your parents follow, to grow up a certain way, to go to high school the same way, to go to college to same way, that the only way to get a job is if you go to college, that we might have to dress a certain way, and that you might even have to play an instrument the same way. But I've realized that's all wrong. We don't have to do anything a certain way. There are so many options in the world but we choose to shut them out because it's not what we've learned or it seems in possible. But I don't think anything is on possible. "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" Philippians 4:13. If you are not religious, then this qoute from the bible May not apply to you, but I believe anything is possible. So why not choose those other options or those different ways? 
I brought my guitar down to Florida, and played it from time to time. I understood that I could take my own advise. Why should a play an instrument this way? Why do I have to make a song this way? Why do I have to make an album tho way? Why do I have to learn guitar this way? I began questioning myself. I don't know exactly how I'm going to change my ways of playing or change the ways of doing my project but I know that it's gonna be something that is unknown to me and unknown to everyone but I'm going to make it known 

Sunday, February 9, 2014

Not too Much

This past week not much has happened but there is still definitely progression. I do not if I have shared the lyrics of my second song "Behind that Screen", so I will show the lyrics below.

calling me ugly wont make you any prettier
Calling me fat wont make you any thinner
So keep on being cruel then tell me how that goes
But I've learned that being mean behind a screen wont get you very far

I didn't do nothing wrong to you
stop calling me names
this aint no game
If you got a problem with me you might as well tell me
face to face
not screen to screen
so just keep hiding behind that screen

calling me fake wont make you any realer
calling me a sleaze wont make you a saint
and calling me dumb wont make you s-m-a-r-t, I will spell it if you please
and I've leaned that being mean behind a screen wont get you very far

repeat chorus

 So this is one of my favorite songs that I've written so far just because the lyrics are so meaningful o me. I think this song can be related within a lot of peoples lives in a lot go different ways. As far as writing more this week I haven't done very much of that but I have accomplished something interesting. Another girl in my class, Anna Crane, has been doing a project where she writes reviews on different musicians each week. She writes about some songs they've written and the kind of artist they are. So, for this week she chose to write about me and it is such a cool experience to be written about for some reason. I am not exactly sure why, but is just a very cool thing. So I will be very interested in reading that.

That is all that has been going on this week but I am sure next will be filled with more lyrics

Sunday, February 2, 2014

From the Heart

Over this past week, Jim and I have been working on a song about loosing a friend. This song is based on how people go their separate ways and there is nothing you can do to change that.  We got through the first verse and the chorus, but for some reason it was one of the hardest song to write for some reason and I didn't really understand why. But then I realized that I just did not have any connection with the song. I didn't feel as if it spoke to me, it almost felt as if I was trying to tell a story that wasn't true. So I made an independent decision, emailed Jim, and told him we had to pitch the song. Although it was hard to throw away a song that I worked so hard on, I realized there was no point to write this song if it didn't mean anything to me. How would it ever mean something to my listeners when it meant nothing to me? So after I pitched the song I decided I needed to write a song that came from the heart. So I came up with a song about being cheated on. Although this is a very mainstream topic it  is something I feel strongly about. The first verse and chorus are listed below.

Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me.
Now you want me back, even beggin on your knees.
Well I aint comin back anymore, cause you seemed just fine with that other girl.
And I aint wasting all my time givin everything to cheatin guy.

This aint card game, you didnt just take a look at the cards in my hand.
You didnt just slip yourself an extra twenty from fake monopoly money
This aint a game, you are to blame, and you dont deserve anything but a cheap cheatin cheater like you

As you can see there are some rough patches within the lyrics but I am hoping that with Jim's help we will be able to work through them.

This past week I also emailed a man by the name of Bernie Nelson. He is a hit writer for country singers like Jason Aldean and Trace Adkins. I had been wanting to email him for a while but didn't because I thought there would be no chance of him to email me back but I realized that I had nothing to loose, so I emailed him. He emailed back saying that he would love to write with me but is going on a radio tour for the next 2 weeks and will get back to me when he gets back. So that was very exciting to me.

Monday, January 27, 2014

New Ideas

Over this past week I haven't done tooo much with my project due to the fact that it has been midterms and I have been very stressed out about everything going on. Although, Jim and I did make some steps forward with my project. We have completly finished my second song called either "Screen to Screen" or "Behind that Screen". We have not totally decided on a title but we are working on what sounds best and what fits the song most. Aside from finishing this song we were thinking of new ideas for new songs. What Jim has me do is something he calls "scatters" he will say a subject like "bully" or "breakup" and I will right down the first 50 words that come to my head about that subject. So after going through "scatters" for a few rounds he reads over all the words. After he looks through the different subject he picks the subject that he believes that I feel most strongly about. So Jim picked the subject of "friends". After he picks the subject he just wants me talk. As simple as that. Just talk about different expeiriences, of different feelings I take in. And that is the start of the song.

My mother was was out to dinner with my dad and they met another couple at a bar. The women that my mom met started talking about how her son is. A songwriter and singer and has been recording at a studio called "soupcan studio" which I believe is related in Detorit. My mom then went on to say how I play guitar and sing and the other couple gave my mom the contact information for the studio. It's not easy to find a recording studio who is willing to record a 15 year old girl who has not had much background in music. So that was definitly a positive step towards the recording aspect.

Jim and I will be meeting up this Thursday and will be working on co-writing the new song. I wanted to take the aspect of loosing someone you once cared so much and now are all of the sudden are just strangers. I want to focus on the fact that one day a person can mean the world to you and then next day you're irreverlant to their life. Through my songs I want my listeners to know that they are never alone. I want them to know that most likely someone has gone through the same and has gotten through it